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Moray House

Rugby Football Club

Ground: Jack Kane Centre, 208 Niddrie Mains Road, Edinburgh.

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HISTORY:

A Legend is born

Moray House Rugby Football Club stuttered into existence in season 1946-47 as the rather cumbersomely entitled Moray House School Former Pupils R.F.C. and was a sub-section of Moray House School Former Pupils Club. In the main it was formed by ex-pupils returning from the forces, presumably British, (click here for the first ever team sheet) at the end of the Second World War. During it’s early years the club led a somewhat nomadic existence playing at Prestonfield and Union Park, Corstorphine, before finally settling down at Prestonfield when the ground became available due to the efforts of the first president of the club Dr. Sutherland a lecturer at Moray House College.

In the late 1950’s the school was closed and the club’s principal source of players was cut off. In attempt to remedy this the club became an open one and the Former Pupils tag was deleted from the club name. Thus the Moray House R.F.C. legend was born.

In the 1980’s Moray House College was forced by the education authorities to put Prestonfield up for sale and the team became homeless.The ground is still unused and lies overgrown and vandalised despite our attempts to regain it.

We are now playing at, and are well looked after by the Jack Kane Centre at Niddrie and although not one of the top playing sides in the capital our organisation is good and we claim to be one of the more social sides in Edinburgh (Editor’s note: Basically when translated into practical English this means that we are crap at Rugby and infinitely more skilled in bending our elbows). We meet after our Saturday Games and our Tuesday training nights in the The Crags where our sponsors provide the after-match caviar and chips.

We also fulfil our District responsibilities by providing our fair share of referees and the Edinburgh District Rugby Union XV Team Secretary. The Club President (Dinosaur) was on the Edinburgh Committee for 21 years and for about 15 of those a full Edinburgh XV Selector.

As a club we are in good heart (albeit one fitted with a pacemaker) but like most clubs at our level we are very much in need of players (roughly 30) to enable us to run 2 XV’s with success. So, if you live in the Edinburgh area and want to play rugby, want to learn to play rugby or just want an excuse for drinking to excess please contact us.In view of our impending 60th anniversary, we would also like to make contact with any old club members out there. So, if you've ever played for Moray House or you know somebody who has please get in touch. Obviously it's unlikely people are going to admit to being ex-House players so here are a few pointers which may help to confirm your worst fears about somebody.
Do they ?

  • Drink heavily (without ever buying a round)
  • suddenly burst into tears when asked if they've ever played rugby
  • talk in their sleep (typically saying things like "fuck off Willy you smelly old bastard"
  • become nauseous when offered a pie.


If so, please get in touch, we can help them.
 

        CLUB SONG (to the tune of Lily Marlene)

Recently at Prestonfield we had a jolly good scheme
In order to do some boozing we formed a rugby team
From Edinburgh we dredged the scum
We said you lot can be the scrum

We are the Moray House FP
We are an awful shower

Our captain comes from Birmingham we don't know why he troubles
'Cause everytime he raises a trot the sweat comes out in bubbles
But we know something at which he's good
He's a champion puller of the pud

Chorus

Pack leader in the loose scrum shouting heel boy heel 
I grabbed him by the bollocks you should have heard the fucker squeal
He squirmed and he squealed till he hit the grass
Then  a number 10 boot went up his arse

Chorus

Jumping in a line out jumping for a ball
I grabbed a second row forward by his lowest hanging ball
He squirmed and he squealed till he hit the floor
Then he didn't play rugby any more

Chorus

The referee was there whistle in his hand
He might as well have conducted McNamarras band
He didn't see the punches, the knock on or the kicks
'Cause we know all the dirty tricks

Chorus

Sitting in the pavilion drinking lemonade
Talking about the afternoon and the fuck ups that were made
And if you think I've had too much beer
Just pour it in the other ear

Chorus